


The Uchiha Drunkenness Scale

by punk_pandame



Category: Naruto
Genre: Alcohol, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Modern: No Powers, Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Bottom Uzumaki Naruto, Cards Against Humanity, Clingy Uchiha Sasuke, Dai-nana-han | Team 7 Bonding (Naruto), Drunk Sex, Drunkenness, Established Relationship, Eventual Sex, Fluff and Smut, Frotting, Gai is Lee and Neji and Tenten's Dad, Game Night, Kakashi is Sasuke's Dad, M/M, Minor Gaara/Rock Lee, Minor Haruno Sakura/Karin, Minor Hatake Kakashi/Maito Gai | Might Guy, Minor Nara Shikamaru/Hyuuga Neji, Minor Temari/Tenten, Movie Night, Not Suitable/Safe For Work, Public Display of Affection, Sleepy Cuddles, Slow Dancing, The Santiago Drunkenness Scale, Top Uchiha Sasuke, Weddings, not sns wedding sorry, team taka - Freeform, thanks b99 for inventing the drunkenness scale for me to shamelessly take advantage of
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-03-12
Updated: 2021-03-16
Packaged: 2021-03-19 02:49:09
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 4,854
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29992755
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/punk_pandame/pseuds/punk_pandame
Summary: Sasuke's personality changes in a predictable pattern with each drink. Naruto and Sakura write it down to make The Uchiha Drunkenness Scale.Inspired by the (in)famous Santiago Drunkenness Scale from Brooklyn Nine-NineWIP, NSFW, All acts are consensual
Relationships: Uchiha Sasuke/Uzumaki Naruto
Comments: 25
Kudos: 95





	1. First Drink Sasuke- "Pinky"

**1 Drink Sasuke- Pinky**

Naruto placed the drink in front of Sasuke. He regarded it skeptically.

“Don’t be a lil piss-baby about it,” he admonished. “It’s your twenty-first birthday. You can reject the celebrations all ya want, but you’re _having_ a drink.” Sasuke glared at him, but took a sip anyway. His face screwed up in distaste.

“Is this just… orange juice?” he asked. Naruto nodded.

“Orange juice and vodka. S’called a ‘screwdriver’, bastard. It’s good, right?” He already knew the answer. 

“I can’t taste the vodka. It’s too _sweet_ ,” he complained, pushing it back at Naruto. He rolled his eyes, taking a sip for himself. It was definitely sweet. He’d intentionally put only half a shot in it, having learned from experience with Lee not to go straight for it without knowing the recipient’s alcohol tolerance. Sasuke had a virgin system; he didn’t want to immediately put him under the table. And Sasuke definitely didn’t want that, either. _Probably should have figured it’d be too sweet for him, but rather that than have him spit out saying it tastes like Sharpies…_

“Hm… let’s try this instead.” 

Naruto downed the screwdriver and set the cup aside, pulling out a new one and a large container of unsweetened cranberry juice from the fridge. He poured a full shot this time, and filled the rest of the glass with cranberry juice. Sasuke had gotten up by then to see what he was doing.

“This one’s a classic. Vodka cranberry. I usually get it sweetened and with some lime in it, but I’ll keep it simple for ya. Try.”

Sasuke took it with a cautious glare, giving it a sniff this time. Evidently deciding it was fine, he took a little sip. Naruto watched a momentary light brighten his eyes before he took a bigger sip. 

“You like it?” He nodded.

“Tart. I can taste the vodka.”

“Is that good or bad?” He’d always been sensitive to strong tastes.

“Good. It’s sharp, but… _good_ sharp.”

With that, Sasuke took his new prize to the couch, curling up in his usual corner. Naruto smiled, making himself another drink and joining him on the opposite corner. Sasuke was flipping channels, settling eventually on a UCF fight. They watched it together. It wasn’t long before Sasuke was setting his empty glass on a coaster. Naruto raised a brow.

“So? How was your first drink?” he asked as a commercial came on.

“Good. I feel warm, though.” Naruto laughed a little. The dusting of pink on his cheeks was a sure sign.

“Yeah, well. It does that.” Sasuke grunted, shifting into a more comfortable position. The rest of the night was spent in easy silence, only broken by critiques of the fighters’ forms and groans when one they liked lost.

Naruto took the dishes to the sink once the matches ended. He felt Sasuke come up behind him. His arms wrapped soft around Naruto’s waist, and he gladly leaned back into the affectionate gesture.

“Thank you for letting me have a quiet birthday,” he mumbled into Naruto’s shoulder. He could feel the heat of Sasuke’s cheek through his shirt. _Probably a lightweight. Have to keep an eye on that…_

He turned around in Sasuke’s grasp, dropping a kiss to his hair.

“Of course.”


	2. Second Drink Sasuke- "Giggles"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "next chapter in a few days!" he said, knowing it was a lie because he has no self control. hence, less than 24hrs later- another chapter!

**2 Drink Sasuke- Giggles**

For the next two months, Sasuke only ever had one drink at a time, and only on Saturday nights. It had been a chore convincing him to try something other than a vodka cranberry, but Naruto had successfully gotten him to drink a Moscow mule and a vodka salty dog, both of which he seemed to enjoy. Naruto pointedly did not press the issue of drinking  _ more _ , just trying _different_ drinks.

This particular weekend they were out with Sakura and Sai. They’d gotten a bottle of sake for the table, and Sasuke had gone out of his comfort zone to try it. He blinked at the first sip, a little wide-eyed. Naruto raised a brow.

“It's good," Sasuke said, almost confusedly. Naruto smiled.

“Yeah?” He nodded.

“Are we finally turning Sasuke into an alcoholic like us?” Sakura joked, elbow nudging Naruto in the ribs. He laughed.

“No, no. Just learning what he likes.”

They spent another few minutes teasing each other, Sasuke as quiet as usual and Sai chiming in here and there. Naruto was surprised when Sasuke poured himself more sake. Their eyes met across the table. Naruto raised a brow.  _ A second drink? _ He shrugged, raising it to his lips.  _ Yeah, why not. _

“What kinda silent conversation are  _ you _ two having?” Sakura asked, glancing quizzically between them. Naruto laughed.

“Oh, it’s nothin’. I’ve just never seen Sasuke have two drinks in a row before. I was surprised.” Sasuke shrugged again.

“I like the sake. Sue me.”

“Your rich boy ass? No way,  I wouldn’t sue you!” Sakura joked. And just like that, the table returned to its usual banter.

Sai was telling a story now in his usual disjointed, wonky fashion. One might anticipate that someone who could tell complex narratives using pictures alone would be a better verbal story-teller, but unfortunately that was  _ not _ the case with Sai. Naruto and Sakura didn’t want him to think they’d lost interest and stop, so they listened with rapt attention, but they kept exchanging glances with one another that said, very clearly,  _ I have no idea what the fuck he’s talking about.  _

“... and then she said, ‘yeah, I’ll just take the plums instead’. Isn’t that strange?” he finished, looking expectantly at Naruto and Sakura. They exchanged a panicked glance now-  _ what the hell did he even say, what’s so strange about buying plums at a fruit stand, WHAT THE FUCK ARE WE SUPPOSED TO SAY?! _ \- and turned to try and piece together a coherent response together when, to their utter shock, Sasuke responded. With  _ laughter _ .

Naruto and Sakura’s jaws dropped instantaneously, shamelessly gawking at Sasuke. He was still laughing, face flushed, trying to muffle it behind his hand.

“What?” he giggled. “It was a funny story.” Sai grinned.

“Looks like _someone_ here finally appreciates me.”

“Holy shit,” Naruto and Sakura breathed in unison, exchanging yet another glance. This one was the most dangerous of all: mischievous. 

“We’re gonna get him so wasted one of these days,” Sakura promised under her breath, Sasuke turning in his seat to listen to another of Sai’s completely unintelligible stories.

“Oh hell yeah we are. Start makin’ a chart, bitch.”

“Fuck yeah, I love charts.”

The Uchiha Drunkenness Scale was born.


	3. Third Drink Sasuke- "Butterfly"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hope you got a good dentist hehehe 😆🍡 tooth-rotting fluff ahead

**3 Drink Sasuke- Butterfly**

Naruto was in awe. Plain and simple.

He watched, stunned, as Sasuke drifted from group to group, scotch in hand. He had a blush on his cheeks and a charming smile on his face. He spoke with people as if he’d always been socially adept, as if he’d never experienced anxiety or irritation a second in his life. Naruto nudged Sakura, pointing. She turned, earrings swinging and reflecting the light from the chandelier. Her eyes widened.

“Is this 3 Drink Sasuke?” she asked. Naruto nodded. “I thought Giggles was good. We got a whole social butterfly now.”

“We’ll call him Butterfly, then.” Sakura nodded her agreement, adding a new line to the chart in her phone, taking notes. He was coming back around toward their side of the room; Naruto could just barely catch the swell of his laugh over the music and dozens of other voices as Neji said something to him, probably a snarky remark about Lee and Gai’s dancing. 

“Gai’s spent more time dancing with Lee than his new husband,” Ino remarked, sipping more wine. “What a fuckin’ dolt.” 

“This is what I deal with every goddamned day,” Tenten replied. “They’re _both_ dolts. Kakashi only encourages it.”

“He thinks it’s funny?”   
“Hilarious. The height of entertainment. He looks forward to finding out what Gai and Lee have been up to when he gets home from work every day.” Ino shook her head.

“I’m so sorry,” she consoled.

Naruto looked back toward the dance floor. Gai and Lee were, in fact, keeping the party alive entirely on their own, dancing their asses off. Kakashi, meanwhile, seemed content to stand on the sidelines and watch, eyes filled with mirth above his mask. Normally, Sakura probably would have berated Kakashi for not mingling more at his  _ own wedding reception _ , but Sasuke was doing a surprisingly good job as his stand-in.  _ I’m so happy for them. All of them. The whole family. ‘Cause they’re a family now, I guess. Though the idea of Sasuke and Lee technically being brothers is  _ _ killing _ _ me, it’s so funny- _

“Hey.”

Naruto blinked up at Sasuke. He smiled down at Naruto, leaning forward to plant a kiss on his forehead. Naruto blushed as Tenten and Ino made wretching noises nearby.

“Hey, knock it off!” Sakura admonished, tossing a bag of almonds at them. Sasuke flipped a dismissive wrist.

“Don’t waste your time with homophobes.”   
“Sasuke, we’re  _ gay _ ,” Tenten deadpanned.

“Everybody at this wedding’s gay,” he shot back, grin nearly wicked. “So you better be extra careful about being a homophobe.”

“Oh boo, you whore,” Ino cut in, throwing the bag of almonds at him. “Ruining our fun.” He raised a brow.

“Whore? That’s rich coming from you.” 

Rather than let them volley insults back and forth, Naruto stood and grabbed Sasuke’s hand.

“Hey, let’s dance!” he offered, tugging a little. Sasuke hesitated, smile dropping off his face.

“Oh, I don’t know-”

“Aw c’mon, I  _ know _ you can! Listen, there’s a slow song coming up, right?” Sasuke nodded.

“The Couples’ Dance,” he clarified. Naruto knew it would be “Unforgettable” by Nat King Cole, and he  _ only _ knew because Sasuke had made the playlist, and thus agonized for hours over song placement. Naruto had heard every song about half a million times by then.

“Slow dances are easy! C’mon,  _ please _ ?” he begged, giving his best puppy-dog stare. Sasuke finally let himself smile again, gaze dropping so he could look at Naruto from under his lashes in that stupidly cute way that always always  _ always _ made his heart flutter.

“Well… it  _ is _ the Couples’ Dance, and we  _ are _ a couple,” he relented, lacing Naruto’s fingers in his. Now it was Sasuke’s turn to tug, leading him to the dance floor. Naruto waved bye to Sakura, who waved back with a smile that morphed quickly into a scowl as Ino opened the almonds and chucked one at her.

The lights shifted to a muted magenta, bathing Sasuke in shades of pink. 

“Just follow me,” Naruto soothed, feeling how rigid Sasuke was as he placed their hands on each other’s bodies. Sasuke’s arms around Naruto’s neck, since he was slightly shorter and needed to look up into Naruto’s face anyway, Naruto’s arms around Sasuke’s waist. Naruto started with a gentle sway to the beat, letting Sasuke get accustomed to the rhythm. “Dancing is a lot like fighting. Y’know how we always fall into sync at the dojo?” Sasuke nodded. “Dancing’s just the same. In fact, it’s easier. All you have to do is move on the beat with your partner and you’ll look like you know what you’re doing.”

Sasuke nodded again, daring to move his feet now. Naruto guided him, slow and steady, softly singing along to the music.

“No never before, has someone been more- ooh- unforgettable…” Sasuke ran his fingers up through Naruto’s hair, gazing into his eyes. Naruto smiled.  _ He’s in the moment now. And he’s moving perfectly in sync with me. Always in sync…  _ “There ya go. See? Not hard.”

“Not hard,” Sasuke agreed, shying away, suddenly coy. Naruto tucked a lock of hair behind his ear, drawing his gaze upward again.

“Y’know, I don’t think I’ve told you yet how good you look in your tux.” Sasuke probably blushed brighter, but it was obscured by the pink wash.

“Thank you. You look handsome in your suit.” Sasuke pressed their foreheads together. “You also smell really good. What cologne is that?” Naruto smirked, leaning in to share a sugary-sweet kiss.  _ The only sweet he’ll never turn down…  _

“That’s for me to know and you to find out. You like it?” He nodded.

“You should wear it more. S’a lot better than miso.” Naruto pinched his side, making him laugh and swat his hand away.  _ Ticklish. _

“Hush, you! I know you don’t mind the miso smell.” Sasuke gave a soft chuckle.

“You’re right, I don’t mind. Smells like home.”

Naruto’s heart nearly bursted right there and then.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> some Very Important notes: kakashi and gai's first dance song was "time after time" by cyndi lauper  
> they did a father-kids dance with kakashi, gai, sasuke, lee, neji, and tenten to the fuckin' "addams family" theme of all things and the kids HATED it and cringed the whole time but kakashi and gai were LIVING for their embarrassment  
> the reception ended with everyone drunkenly singing bohemian rhapsody  
> best wedding ever


	4. Fourth Drink Sasuke- "Entertainment Whore"

**4 Drink Sasuke- Entertainment Whore**

“We should play a game.”

Naruto and Sakura had held their breaths the entire time they waited for the fourth drink to hit. The last thing they were expecting was for Butterfly to turn into something even more sociable. Something that wanted to play  _ games _ . 

Sasuke Uchiha did  _ not _ play games. 

Yet here he was, getting up and ambling toward the hallway closet. Naruto raised a brow and glanced at Sakura. She shrugged. Sai looked dubious- he didn’t usually like games either and he was the furthest thing from drunk enough to let loose- and Juugo looked unaffected save for a slightly raised brow, but Suigetsu looked  _ delighted _ . Karin exchanged a confused glance with Naruto.

“He  _ never _ plays games with us.” Naruto shrugged back at his cousin. Sakura sidled closer to her on the bench with a shiver. “Oh  _ hell _ no. I told you to bring a sweater.”

“It’s not my fault they keep this place like an icebox,” Sakura whined. Karin rolled her eyes, but didn’t stop Sakura from resting her head on her shoulder. Naruto smiled.  _ It’s still a little weird seeing my best friend going out with my cousin, but even I can admit they’re kinda cute together…  _

“Naruto, why do all our games  _ suck _ ?!” Sasuke called from the hallway.

“Just take out Cards Against Humanity, jackass!” Karin called back, slinging her arm around Sakura’s shoulders.

“Oh fuck yeah!” Suigetsu agreed. “I’m gonna kick your ass, Karin!”

“Not if I kick yours first!”

“I’m pretty sure Mr. Dick Jokes is gonna beat all of us,” Naruto chimed in, jutting his chin toward Sai.

“I only joke about  _ your _ dick, Naruto.”   
“You don’t even know what my dick looks like!”

“I know it’s small.”

“IT’S NOT SMALL, SAI-!”

“HEY!” Sasuke interrupted, slamming the box of cards on the table. “No arguing. Game.  _ Now _ .”

And so the cards were dealt, and the game commenced. Sasuke didn’t have another drink, only took little sips of Naruto’s to keep himself at the same level. The rest got steadily hammered (except for Juugo, because _someone_ had to drive and it may as well be him). Suigetsu had quickly shifted his focus to Sai when it became clear he was the _real_ challenger, and he was the one who kept insisting upon round after round. Sasuke was reading now, flipping the white cards over one at a time. They weren’t that great; it was late, they were tired, and this throw-away round was a sigh that this would probably be their last before people wanted to head home, Suigetsu’s complaints be damned.

“In Michael Jackson’s final moments, he thought about-” Sasuke picked up the last white card, and his lips quivered as he scanned it. “-a sweaty, panting leather daddy.”

There was a beat of silence before the whole table erupted in raucous laughter.

“This one!” Sasuke declared. “This one, oh god!” 

He pushed the cards forward, Sai swooping in and taking the black card with an air of victory while Sasuke collapsed against the table in hysterics. Sakura nudged Naruto, showing him the new addition to the chart under the table:  _ 4 Drink Sasuke- Entertainment Whore _ . Naruto laughed, pushing her away.

“You’re awful,” he murmured amusedly.

“But am I wrong?”   
“ _ No _ .”

“Looks like I win,” Sai said, displaying his collection of black cards.

“Aw fuck, again?! One more round, sudden death, winner takes all!” Suigetsu cried, red-faced. Karin shook her head, yawning on Sakura’s shoulder.

“I’m out.”   
“Yeah, we should get you home,” Sakura agreed, twirling a lock of red hair around her finger. Sasuke was still laughing, having devolved into quiet wheezes, tears streaming down his face.

“Yeah, I think it’s time to call it a night for Sasuke, too,” Naruto said, rubbing his back until he calmed down.

“Holy  _ shit _ , my face hurts,” he giggled, wiping the tears away even as more collected in the corners of his eyes.

Naruto put the game away and ushered their friends out while Sasuke drank some water in the kitchen and got a hold of himself. Soon, the apartment was empty, the warmth of good friends still lingering in the air. They both tumbled onto the couch at the same time, Sasuke’s head ending up in Naruto’s lap. Naruto smiled down at him, playing with his hair. Sasuke all but purred at the touch, leaning into it.

“You have a good time?” he asked. Sasuke nodded, smiling and relaxed.

“Think I like being drunk,” he yawned. 

“Welcome to the club. Please don’t become an alcoholic.” Sasuke snorted.

“Like I’d let that happen.”

“Yeah, you’re pretty anal.”

“I prefer the term ‘control freak’, thank you very much.”

Naruto laughed, leaning down and pressing a kiss to Sasuke’s forehead. He shifted, capturing Naruto’s lips with his own.

“What if I made you a different kind of anal?” Naruto asked, waggling his eyebrows suggestively. Sasuke snorted again, smiling against him.

“Wouldn’t  _ you _ be the one who’s anal?” he replied, nudging noses.

“Listen man, I’m drunk, too. This is confusing. Wanna fuck me?” Sasuke laughed.

“Have I ever said no to that?”


	5. Fifth Drink Sasuke- "Cuddles"

**5 Drink Sasuke- Cuddles**

“Naruto, what the hell is in your pocket?” Sasuke complained, just loud enough to be heard over the music. Naruto fished his keys out, dangling them in front of Sasuke’s face. 

“It wouldn’t be a problem that my keys were in my pocket if you weren’t sitting on my lap, y’know.”

“But I’ve been on the floor for  _ hours _ . And you’re comfy,” Sasuke argued, settling now that the keys weren’t poking him in the ass, arms wrapped around Naruto’s neck.

“Don’t be dramatic. That movie was only an hour and a half long.” Naruto dropped the keys on the table nonetheless, deciding right then and there that he was done drinking for the night. He knew he’d start getting forgetful if he had more, and he had a feeling Sasuke wouldn’t be able to pick up his slack for once.

Sakura shook her head from her spot on Shikamaru’s couch, grinning.

“Feeling affectionate, Sasuke?” she teased. He smiled, nodding as he rested his head on Naruto’s shoulder.

“We should call you Cuddles,” Naruto commented, poking at Sasuke’s cheek. He giggled softly, burying his face into the side of Naruto’s throat.

“I can’t help it. You’re so cute.” Sakura got the hint, though; she typed a note for “Cuddles” into her phone and sent Naruto the updated version of the chart. Karin tried to get a hold of the phone to see what they were up to, but Sakura was faster, tucking it in her back pocket and crushing herself into the corner of the couch to keep Karin’s hands off it. They bickered over it, and Naruto rolled his eyes affectionately. Sasuke had no idea, drifting in a drunken bubble of happiness, heaving a contented sigh against Naruto’s neck. “You smell good.”

“There’s no way I smell good. I’ve been sweating for an hour straight.”

“Don’t smell sweaty… Just smell like you…”

Naruto smiled, shifting in his chair to hold Sasuke better. He was actually making Naruto’s sweating worse- Sasuke was normally a living space heater, drunk he was basically a  _ furnace- _ but Naruto didn’t complain. _ He usually pretends he wouldn’t touch me with a ten-foot pole in front of other people, so it’s kinda nice for him to be all touchy-feely like this…  _

“You’re so pretty,” he praised, tugging at some hair at the nape of Naruto’s neck and twisting it around his finger. “Pretty blonde hair.” Naruto chuckled.

“Somebody’s a tad wasted, huh?”

“M’not wasted,” Sasuke denied, placing a soft kiss to Naruto’s neck. “Jus’ a lil drunk.”

“Mm-hm. So you’re not slurring ‘cause of the alcohol, right?”

“Nope. Jus’ a lil sleepy.”

“Ah, so  _ that’s _ why you’re so cuddly.” Sasuke’s usual severe frown flashed across his face. He pulled sharply on Naruto’s hair, making him hiss in pain (and okay, maybe a little pleasure).

“Don’ be stupid.”

“I’m not being stupid! You get cuddly when you’re tired.”  _ Not  _ _ this _ _ cuddly, but still…  _

“Hey! Loverboys!” Shikamaru called. “You playing or not?” he asked, gesturing to the TV set up for another movie and the coffee table littered with different drink options.

They didn’t play the new drinking game. They didn’t even watch the movie. They just sat on the kitchen chair, with Sasuke whispering sweet nothings into Naruto’s ear, leaving kisses here and there sometimes. He complimented Naruto’s hair more, and his eyes, and his skin, and just about every facet of his personality between sips of the drink Naruto had abandoned. Sasuke was shockingly good at keeping a steady level of inebriation. He spent at least ten minutes trying to make the teeniest, tiniest braid in existence out of Naruto’s hair, but it was too short and he was too tired to focus properly. By the time the movie ended, Naruto was mostly sober, and Sasuke was mostly asleep. The other couples, though, looked ready to continue on to a third. Temari was hardly even drunk, having a proper conversation with Tenten- who was sitting between her legs on the floor- and Shikamaru, who was sprawled against Neji’s side. Neji himself was texting Gai and Kakashi in the family group chat, complaining to Lee about how nosy they were. Lee was putting stickers all over Gaara’s face; why he allowed it, Naruto would never guess, but he did look cute covered in little stars and hearts. Karin and Sakura were arguing about something stupid. In short: lively. This crowd was lively, and Sasuke was the furthest thing from it.  _ We’re usually the last to leave Couples’ Movie Night, so I feel kinda bad, but I should really get him home…  _

“Hey,” he muttered, wiggling around to try and wake him up. Sasuke grumbled into Naruto’s shoulder.

“What?”

“You’re passing out on me. We gotta go home.”

“M’not-” He yawned. “-passin’ out. Jus’ tired.”

“I know. We can go home and sleep as soon as you get up.” He curled tighter into Naruto’s body.

“Don’t wanna get up,” he whined, voice muffled by the material of Naruto’s shirt. Naruto sighed, but it wasn’t half as long-suffering as he intended. He could feel the adoration in his own face as he kissed Sasuke’s hair. 

“Alright, alright.”

That’s how Naruto ended up carrying Sasuke home for the first time.

Thankfully Shikamaru and Neji only lived a few blocks away, so it wasn’t a big deal. Naruto kind of owed it to Sasuke to not be a dick about it; Sasuke had dragged Naruto home drunk from much further places without issue, after all. If anything, Naruto was surprised that Sasuke was being so cooperative. He’d anticipated some grumpiness when he picked him up and shuffled him onto his back. But no, Sasuke just clung to him like monkey, face buried in his shirt. His grip loosened as he fell asleep to the sway of Naruto’s steps, but he never let go. Even once Naruto managed to get them inside their own apartment, Sasuke still held fast.  _ Should have named him Clingy instead…  _ Naruto couldn’t help but smile, though, as he knelt on the bed and put Sasuke down. He allowed the separation, but only long enough to settle on his side. He immediately reached out for Naruto again, catching the hem of his shirt and tugging.

“Sasuke, we should change into pajamas.”

“Just c’mere, goddamn it.”

Naruto shook his head, but he was smiling as he pulled his shirt over his head and wriggled out of his jeans. Sasuke sluggishly got out of his own shirt, and Naruto did him the favor of taking his pants off for him. He swallowed as he found himself hovering over Sasuke, flushed and nearly naked, hair splayed across the pillow and arms above his head, as if waiting for Naruto to pin them down. He swallowed again, leaning down and kissing him chastely at first. Sasuke met him where he was. When his tongue swept across the seam of Sasuke’s lips, he opened his mouth for him. They moaned softly into each other, Naruto’s hands sliding up Sasuke’s body until he was holding him down by the wrists.

“Is this okay?” he asked against Sasuke’s lips as they parted for air.

“More than okay.”

Naruto dove back in for another kiss, this one hotter, hungrier. He sucked Sasuke’s tongue, relishing the way it made him gasp. Their bodies rolled against each other.

“Sasuke…”

“Naruto…”

He leaned back and shimmied them both out of their underwear, reaching for the drawer built into their headboard for lube and condoms. Sasuke reached between them, grasping them both in one hand and giving a slow, controlled thrust. Naruto groaned, nearly dropping the bottle on Sasuke’s face.

“Fuck, S’uke…” He grinned lovingly and mischeivously all at once, thrusting against Naruto again and grazing his thumb over the head of Naruto’s cock. He shuddered with a needy whimper.

“How d’you want it tonight, Naruto?” he crooned in that sultry voice that made Naruto  _ melt _ . He closed his eyes, trying to think.

“Slow and sweet,” he managed, opening the lube and pouring it over his own fingers. “Just like you.” A laugh bubbled up from Sasuke’s chest.

“S’at really how you think of me?”

“Tonight it is.”

Naruto leaned down for another kiss, only to break it as his own fingers breached him. Sasuke caught him by the cheek and sealed their mouths together, swallowing down every noise Naruto made as he stretched himself. Sasuke’s hand pulled languidly between them, thumb swiping circles against the head of Naruto’s cock, making his hips stutter. They separated as Naruto drew his fingers out, Sasuke sheathing them each with a condom.

Naruto groaned at the sensation of Sasuke’s length sliding into him, a stiff heat that made his hips buck involuntarily.

“Ngh…  _ Naruto… _ ” Sasuke breathed, hands on his hips now while Naruto gripped the headboard. He forced himself to move at an even pace, careful not to go too fast yet.  _ I don’t want this to be over too soon…  _ Sasuke moaned beneath him, hands dropping to the backs of Naruto’s thighs. “Fuck…  _ Naruto _ …”

Blissed-out eyes gazed up at him, framed by tousled black hair and ruddy cheeks, underscored by a ruby mouth that sang Naruto’s praises with every thrust.

“Naruto… so good,  _ fuck… _ !”

Naruto tossed his head back as Sasuke finally rutted against his prostate, moaning deeply. His legs already burned, trembling as he tried to keep the rhythm controlled, dragging the pleasure out  _ just a little longer _ . Sasuke rolled his hips to match Naruto’s. The smack of their bodies meeting made heat ripple across Naruto’s skin, his chest heaving.  _ I’m not… gonna last long…  _ He dared a glance down at Sasuke; he seemed in a similar state, sweat glistening on his chest, pasting his hair to his forehead. His eyes were hooded, glazed, mindless with pleasure. His nails were starting to cut crescent moons into Naruto’s thighs.

“Sasu… ke…!”

“ _ Naruto… _ !”

The low groan of his voice had Naruto undone in an instant.

“Sasuk- _ eheh _ ,  _ ah, AH… _ !” Two hard thrusts and a gush of Naruto’s cum later, Sasuke was coming, too, eyes rolling back and heels digging into the mattress.

“ _ Fuck _ , Naruto…” he murmured, panting. Naruto grinned, pushing up one last time to slide Sasuke out, ridding them both quickly of their condoms so he could collapse on top of him. Sasuke grunted, wriggling beneath him until Naruto’s weight settled comfortably, then heaved a huge sigh. Naruto smiled, twirling a lock of Sasuke’s hair around his finger. The first time Sasuke had asked Naruto to lay on him like this, he’d thought he was insane. Now it was second nature to become his sentient weighted blanket at every opportunity. Already he was sinking deeper into the mattress, breath evening out. He clenched and unclenched his fist on Naruto’s back, trying to stay awake.

“Go to sleep,” Naruto soothed, stroking his forehead, trying to erase the crease there.

“Don’ v’much of a choice,” he slurred, punctuated with a yawn. The crease disappeared as his face softened. Naruto smiled again, turning his head so he could rest his cheek on Sasuke’s chest and listen to his heartbeat. It would only be a matter of time before Sasuke grunted and flipped over in his sleep to lie on his stomach instead. Naruto would climb back onto him and pull the sheet around them into a cocoon, and he’d fall asleep, too. For now, though, Naruto just listened to the music of Sasuke’s body, tranquil breaths a counterpoint to tiny snores and a steady pulse. He savored every moment he got to lay in Sasuke’s arms.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> can you guess i'm really missing game nights and movie nights with friends? it's been a year, i miss them 


End file.
